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A Friendly Reminder: The Duggars Are Assholes!

Happy Tuesday, pals! In the spirit of sharing and friendliness, I thought I'd pass along this friendly reminder that the Duggar family is made up of total fucking assholes.

Man Has Great Idea: Woman Should Be Less Angry

Rich geezer Warren Buffett thinks Massachusetts Senator Elizabeth Warren would be a more effective leader if she calmed down and got less mad about stuff that, in her view, is ruining the country.

David Petraeus Will Plead Guilty to Oversharing with His Mistress 

Former CIA director David Petraeus will plead guilty to sharing classified information with Paula Broadwell, his mistress and biographer, according to media reports and court documents.

Sayyida al-Hurra, the Beloved, Avenging Islamic Pirate Queen

The phrase "Muslim woman" evokes a wide variety of images today, many of them dangerously prejudicial; one image that's not conjured up nearly often enough is that of an independent and beautiful woman who had the King of Morocco in the palm of her hand—and also controlled much of the western Mediterranean Sea with her ruthless pirate fleet .

Watch Bachelor Contestant Britt Cry. And Cry. And Cry. And Cry.

There were a lot of fun moments during Monday night's episode of The Bachelor: The Women Tell All, which is the best episode of every season of this show (to use Bachelor-approved superlatives).

Are You the Idiot Who Would Buy Katy Perry's Left Shark Onesie?

After shutting down Etsy vendors who were trying to memorialize the famed "Left Shark" of the 2015 Super Bowl halftime show in art, Katy Perry has revealed her master plan: To make big bucks selling her own Left Shark merchandise.

New Accuser: Cosby Made Me Put Oatmeal On My Face, Pretend to Be a Queen

A woman named Patricia has come forward accusing Bill Cosby of drugging and sexually assaulting her between 1978 and 1980, joining a chorus of nearly 30 other alleged victims of the comedian.

American Hero Cher Calls Piers Morgan an 'Old Diva in Fishnets'

Yesterday, famed blowhard Piers Morgan—the biggest threat to U.S./British relations since the War of 1812—took to Twitter to express his discontent about pop stars of a certain age (namely Madonna) wearing revealing costumes.

Contractors Aren't Quite Done With 50 Shades 'Sex Room' in Cut SNL Skit

In an SNL clip that was cut for time this week, Dakota Johnson as Anastasia Steele is surprised to find that Christian's playroom renovations are a bit behind schedule.

Westboro Baptist Wanted to Picket Nimoy's Funeral, But Couldn't Find It

It's not quite poetic justice, but we'll take it: the Westboro Baptist Church, a group of litigious trolls with the barest ties to Jesus, were unable to picket Leonard Nimoy's funeral because they don't know where it is.

Watch Jimmy Fallon Solve Kelly Clarkson's Duets Problem

Last week, Kelly Clarkson said something about how no one wants to perform with her but that sad sack Oscar winner John Legend?

Gawker Who's the Man?

Gawker Who's the Man?

Who's the Man? How Being Versatile in Bed Is a Way of Life

A few weekends ago, a straight male friend and I were discussing the straight world's squeamishness about gay sex.

Here's a Weasel Riding a Woodpecker Because, Goddamnit, Why Not?

ABSOLUTLEY INCREDIBLE photo by Martin Le-May. Green Woodpecker and Weasel. Apparently the Woodpecker escaped.

​Watch the Trailer for Lena Dunham's Doc About the Man Who Drew Eloise

After premiering at Sundance, the documentary It's Me, Hilary: The Man Who Drew Eloise will air on HBO on March 23.

Teachers Arrested for Sexing Kids on Beach Also Handed Out Cocaine

School field trips are officially cancelled forever now that more information has come out about the drug and alcohol-fueled romps two high school teachers took with their students last year.

Only Taylor Swift's Song About Psycho Exes Can Soothe This Baby's Cries

Making up for last week's disaster of a tweet about that fucking dress , Taylor Swift has redeemed herself by tweeting a picture of a tiny behbeh having its tears quieted by the hypnotic rhythms and song stylings of "Blank Space," the most appropriate song for behbehs to listen to.

Hillary Clinton Probably Used an AOL Account to Conduct Gov't Business

Hillary Rodham Clinton may be in a whole heap of trouble now that news has leaked that the former Secretary of State used a personal email account — possibly — to conduct her government business and never had an official state department address during her tenure.

Kanye West Is a Humongous Loser

When Kanye West woke up this morning (rubbing the diamond crust out of his eyes and yawning gold ribbon out of his previously snoring maw) (you know he snores), he probably didn't expect a case of the Mondays to hit him.

Piers Morgan Hates Cher's Fishnet Stockings, Cher Doesn't Give a Fuck

In today's Tweet Beat, Piers Morgan continues to act like a pompous, rock-faced ass, Sharon Osbourne kisses a llama and we are all Mara Wilson.